DAILY VIOLET: What happened with my Security... →
violetblue: It had been decided months ago that I would give a talk at Security BSides San Francisco. The subject of my talk was up in the air until just before the conference started, and the organizers were okay with that, but to not inconvenience or surprise the organizers, I decided to present the same…
If, when you bring out the big gun to promote your social media expertise, it’s an email chain letter.
if you retweeted a link to a post on an SEO blog entitled “how to increase your twitter followers.”
if you wrote a 2,400-word blog entry beginning with the words “through brevity there’s clarity.”
if suddenly now, “social media is poison” cause it was so oversold by consultants like you.
if you mock any structures put in place to “manage” social media efforts because they’re clearly not as good as the ones you would create.
if on a social media panel, you talk the whole time, bring the convo back to yourself, drop names, and interrupt everyone with your brilliant insight.
if you opine freely about tools and platforms you’ve never actually used.
if you’ve got a remarkably natural talent to turn all conversations back towards yourself; especially when describing new social media technologies.
if you use euphemisms like “rich design” to denote unrestrained use of the “drop shadow,” “gradient overlay,” and “bevel and emboss” styles in Photoshop.
if sentiments like “I’m a HUGE fan of X—I think maker-of-X could really be onto something” appear in your blog posts (where X is a product or service developed by a large, innovative and profitable company).
if you chide people for incorrect usage of made up social media words.
if you think knowledge is a zero sum game.
if you’ve always got a better app than your peers or already onto the next, best thing, then the old thing all the noobs are using.
if you use twitter; in fact, you are.
if, now that we’ve given you a tool to “update the goddamn homepage,” you decide to delegate the responsibility to an intern.
if your frustration extends as far as demanding—in a tone of exasperation—“why can’t I just update the goddamn homepage?”—but not so far as to actually learn the requisite skills.
if all your apps end in “r.”
if you’ve written a post instructing the world on how to properly pitch you.
if your advice to noobs is offered with a magnanimous tone of authority and always in a public forum so others may benefit, too.
if you’ve made up words to describe marketing.
if you’ve engaged in conversational marketing.
if you self-assuredly proclaimed someone “gets it.”
if all your social web services feed into each other like one constant running cycle of you.
if you’ve ever said “Friend me up!”
if you wrote a manifesto.
if, in the time you spent soliciting input, bouncing ideas, defending yourself, and creating pre-buzz, another person—who actually knows how to make stuff—could have already launched.