if you mock any structures put in place to “manage” social media efforts because they’re clearly not as good as the ones you would create.
You might be a webcock....
With apologies to Dean Allen Merlin Mann who probably coined “webcock” before I even knew I was one.
if on a social media panel, you talk the whole time, bring the convo back to yourself, drop names, and interrupt everyone with your brilliant insight.
if you opine freely about tools and platforms you’ve never actually used.
if you’ve got a remarkably natural talent to turn all conversations back towards yourself; especially when describing new social media technologies.
if you use euphemisms like “rich design” to denote unrestrained use of the “drop shadow,” “gradient overlay,” and “bevel and emboss” styles in Photoshop.
if sentiments like “I’m a HUGE fan of X—I think maker-of-X could really be onto something” appear in your blog posts (where X is a product or service developed by a large, innovative and profitable company).
if you chide people for incorrect usage of made up social media words.
if you think knowledge is a zero sum game.
if you’ve always got a better app than your peers or already onto the next, best thing, then the old thing all the noobs are using.
if you use twitter; in fact, you are.
